I Couldn’t Disagree More With Matthew McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey, the one-time Academy Award winner, rom-com icon, and all-around zen cowboy is back in the headlines. Not for his upcoming Apple TV+ American survival drama The Lost Bus that's dropping October 3 nor for his gravelly charisma or memoir musings.

No, this time, it’s his mattress or more specifically, the size of it. In a recent interaction with Fox News Digital, McConaughey promoted his new book Poems and Prayers, which includes a short verse that’s causing a stir:“The best thing you can /do for your /marriage,/one way to surely/ get ahead,/is get rid of that/ king-size mattress,/and sleep in a/ queen-size bed.”

He wasn’t joking.

McConaughey attributes 13 years of marriage to Camila Alves, in part, to the humble queen-size bed. He even ditched his king-sized one to “get ahead” in their relationship, insisting that sleeping "shoulder-to-shoulder" fosters intimacy and connection.

Alright, alright, alright, I hear you, Matt. But respectfully, I’m calling BS.

Frankly, the size of your mattress is not the secret sauce to a lasting marriage. And while one can appreciate the poetry of wanting to be close to your partner, both literally and metaphorically, a queen-size bed isn’t a relationship therapist. It’s just… smaller.

If anything, mattress preference should be based on need and most definitely not on honeymoon phase of the relationship one dearly misses.

Look, cuddling is great. Touch is great. But anyone in a long-term relationship knows that personal space is just as crucial as pillow talk. Sometimes, love looks like eight uninterrupted hours of sleep without a knee to the back, snores in the ears or an accidental elbow to the nose.

In fact, studies published in Sleep and Biological Rhythms show that women are more likely to have their sleep disrupted by male partners, all thanks to snoring, sleep-talking, or Olympic-level tossing and turning. So, a queen-size bed doesn’t exactly leave much room for evasive maneuvers now, does it?

Moreover, one may argue that a king-size bed is possibly the unsung hero of modern cohabitation. It’s spacious enough to share, but also allows for those sacred few inches of peace when needed. And let's not forget about the dearly needed sleep quality that is directly linked to emotional regulation. A well-rested partner is a happier partner. Isn’t that good for the marriage, too?

Ultimately, it’s not about the square footage of your bed, but the quality of what happens in it and beyond it. Whether you’re spooning in a queen or starfishing in a king, the health of your relationship comes down to communication, effort, and yes, maybe a little snoring tolerance.

So Mr. McConaughey, I respect your poetic sentiment, but I’ll be keeping my king.